March 6th, 1933
The White House
Hick darling, Oh! how good it was to hear your voice, it was inadequate to try & tell you what it meant, Jimmy was near & I couldn’t say “je t’aime et je t’adore” As I longed to do but always remember I am saying it & that I go to sleep thinking of you & repeating our little saying.
Well, now for the diary! Got up at 7:15, walk with Meggie, breakfast in my room at 8 & suddenly Missy appeared half asleep to announce Cermak’s death. Then she had breakfast in my room & I began to unpack & move furniture. Tommy & Nan came about nine and I left them in charge and went with F.D.R. & James at 9:45 to Sen. Walsh’s funeral. I sat in the Senate gallery & the coffin with the candles & lovely flowers looked impressive but I thought the service very unimpressive & the people in the gallery seemed to have come to a show rather than to mourn someone they cared about. I stopped to talk to the widow & daughter, saw Frances Perkins for a minute. She is a little startled to find how many purely social people write her for purely exhibition purposes.
Back by 11 & moved furniture till 12. Then press conference of which I told you. 1 p.m., all governors at conference & their wives to lunch, then a little more furniture moved & 4:20 National Women’s Press Association tea, then home to find a mixture at tea with Mama. 7:30 Isabella came to dine & we had a short talk about her children & Congress & Anna & Elliot. At last 12:10, bed & a talk with you—the nicest time of the day. A week from to-morrow I came back from the telephone & began marking my calendar, Tuesday week is so much better than Thursday!
My room is nearly in order & my bed is in the little room & I can see the monument from it—a great comfort the monument has always been to me. Why, I wonder?
Give Jean my love she is a swell person. No one is like you though. Hick—I love you & good night.
March 9th, 1933
The White House
Hick dearest, It was good to talk to you & you sounded a bit happier. I hated to have Nan go to-night & yet it is rather nice to have a few hours alone, so I know how you feel but I shall miss Nan to-morrow. She has been such a help & apparently enjoyed herself. The one thing which reconciles me to this job is the fact that I think I can give a great many people pleasure & I began to think there may be ways in which I can be useful. I am getting some ideas which I want to talk over with you—
Life is pretty strenuous—one or two a.m. last night & 12:15 now & people still with F.D.R. but this should settle things more or less.
My pictures are nearly all up & I have you in my sitting room where I can look at you most of my waking hours! I can’t kiss you so I kiss your picture good night & good morning! This is the first day I’ve had no letter & I missed it sadly but it is good discipline.
One more day marked off my dear. My dear if you meet me may I forget there are other reporters present or must I behave? I shall want to hug you to death. I can hardly wait!
A world of love to you & good night & God bless you “light of my life,”
December 5th, 1933: Hick to Eleanor
New Hotel Markham and Annex
Tonight it’s Bemidji, away up in the timber country, not a bad hotel, and one day nearer to you. Only eight more days. Twenty-four hours from now it will be only seven more—just a week! I’ve been trying today to bring back your face—to remember just how you look. Funny how even the dearest face will fade away in time. Most clearly I remember your eyes, with a kind of teasing smile in them, and the feeling of that soft spot just northeast of the corner of your mouth against my lips. I wonder what we’ll do when we meet—what we’ll say. Well—I’m rather proud of us, aren’t you? I think we’ve done rather well.
Darling, I’ve been thinking about you so much today. What a swell person you are to back me up the way you do on this job! We do do things together, don’t we? And it’s fun, even though the fact that we both have work to do keeps us apart.
Good night, dear one. I want to put my arms around you and kiss you at the corner of your mouth. And in a little more than week now—I shall!
December 12th, 1933
The White House
Hick darling, 2 letters, a report & a wire! this is a rich day & this is my last letter! The day after to-morrow you will be starting East, don’t fly if the weather isn’t good!
We’ll have tea in my room as soon as you get here Friday & then we’ll decide about Sat. & Sunday—
Dearest one, it will be good to see you. All my love till Friday & God keep you safe,
January 9th, 1934
The White House
Hick darling, It was a crime to wake you last night but I was glad to hear your voice. Oh! dear one it means so much to me to talk to you for a few minutes even at 2 a.m.! We had a very lone and satisfactory meeting on Arthurdale last night & this morning at 11 a.m. Mrs. Morgenthau & I went & visited schools. I had my exercises & swim too! We were late for the ladies of the cabinet lunch but there was nothing to talk about & it was brief. Then mail & preparation for Tommy’s tea, 4 p.m. a Hawaiian table presented, 5 Tommy’s party & I think she enjoyed it. She had to have a care take her & the loot home! Since then I’ve greeted 5 house guests & now I must dress for one of our intimate little dinners & receptions!
I’d like to be travelling with you! You should be reading John Brown. I’ll bring it, we might finish it on our week end!
The schools were interesting to-day because the colored one was so much better than the white—remind me to tell you about it! School lunches especially done with imagination in the colored school & without in the white.
I love you beyond words & long for you but I’m so tired now that I’m glad this is written for it might not have been done to-night! Dear one, I wish you were here. A world of love,
February 4th 1934
The White House
Hick darling, I just talked to you, darling, it was so good to hear your voice. If I could just take you in my arms. Dear, I often feel rebellious too & yet I know we get more joy when we are to-gether than we would have if we had lived apart in the same city & could only meet for short periods now & then. Someday perhaps fate will be kind & let us arrange a life more to our liking for the time being we are lucky to have what we have. Dearest, we are happy to-gether & strong relationships have to grow deep roots. We’re growing them now, partly because we are separated, the foliage & the flowers will come, somehow I’m sure of it. I dread the western trip & yet I’ll be glad when Ellie can be with you, tho’ I’ll dread that too just a little, but I know I’ve got to fit in gradually to your past & with your friends so there won’t be closed doors between us later on & some of this we’ll do this summer perhaps. I shall feel you are terribly far away & that makes me lonely but if you are happy I can bear that & be happy too. Love is a queer thing, it hurts but it gives so much more in return!
Every day now you are one day nearer, the 20th is only 2 weeks & 1 day off now!
A world of love & I do put my arms around you in my dreams dear one,
April 6th, 1934
The White House
Hick darling, I think this may catch you in New Orleans so I am sending it off just to say “I love you.” I’ve been very much ‘Mrs. R’ all day! I loved your wire this a.m. & it brought you nearer. To-morrow I shall wire you.
This day began with Girl Scouts at 8:30 & then a few words to a State Grange meeting, then conferences til 12. Copeland so dull! Tommy & I had lunch to-gether in our living room, 1:15 radio, then conference with a speech from Farley and E.R. who suddenly felt like being herself & not like the first lady said several things the first lady shouldn’t have said. So goodnight & bless you dear on.
A world of love,